Ethan,8,French

hung out with ethan and steph anthony during 8th period today. got in a fight with madame heminger today over her bullshit fucked up version of the french shirts. i REFUSE to buy one. i miss phil so much. ive been crying alot lately. ive realised that i dont ahve any girlfriends, i cant look people in the eye, im not as pretty and girly and normal as other humans, im hated in life, winter always eats away at my heart, i hate life and i really wish i hadnt promised phil not to cut myself bcuz i REALLY wanna. like, REALLY. so i took some time to enjoy some masochism and scallded my hands in really hot water at school. i wanna watch some movies. anybody ahve any suggestions. please? lsitening to down with love and here's to love. mmm. i broke an 11 gauge string, already, brand new. now i STILL cant play broken, but i can still play i miss you. which i really wanna play for phil. phil and i are secretly meeting at pius on friday. maybe. still, the gifts wont be able to be given. going to the mall tomorrow. maybe? with ashley. cashing my checks too. hopefully. anyways. listening to spice girls. nikki and i talked about spice girls today in photography. it was funny. mandi and i discussed music, country and 80s. lol. i might see brian s soon. i hope. idk. but im gonna go. ttya'll later.
p.s. I <3 PHIL