Exhausted
im so very exhuasted. im about ready to faint. no, im not being melodramatic either. i feel like total shit! like im sick but im not. damn you. damn you x10. atleast yesterday was good!
.
met phil in the office, and he wasnt allowd in, so i called myself out of school, and left on the 27th street bus. we went downtown and got on the next bus going north on 27th. we went to petsmart, the most adorable cat was there too. i wanted to take him home. its not fair, life, sometimes. we came back. james rapped for us, and we were gangstas for a while. it was quite fun. claire, and phil, at one time, near me, makes me feel so incredably loved. its mad. i love phil. and my dad's salsa dip. and family guy.
.
you know, i wish i could NOT think of you. i wish you would have hugged me yesterday and i wish you werent attempting, without trying, to ruin everything ive ever dreamed of. you and your attempts at happiness, and your stupid flirting. i hate how you flirt with EVERYTHING. even the guys that call you a queer. its not your fault that girls are hopelessly attracted to you. and thats how you make me feel. hopeless, and worthless. i hate you. i dont care if you make me the happiest ive ever been at times, i truly hate you. even when you make me smile, i hate you. i hate you more and more when my mind forces me to think about you when i WANT to think about someone else. and when i try to hate you, my mind makes me like you. idk. i just hate you and i wish i nver knew you......i wish you'd go away.......but now that i know you, that wont seem to happen. hysteria. good song right?
.
dont worry, thats not about phil. but phil and i will get married someday and have holidays in the dordogne. i know it. i wish i could be in illinois right now. just for the weekend. a weekend away. i know who i think about, but i hate it. i love phil. he needs to get away.
.
last night, i missed tyler. therefor, once again, reducing the number of hours that i sleep by miles. if i dont get sleep in tomorrow, im gonna be dead. i swear it. im so exhausted that i just want to sit and cry during lunch, not eat. at all. im so happy. i am. truly. its just hard to show with...what.....3 hours of sleep? i hate this life.
.
love
Your Posh Bird
.
met phil in the office, and he wasnt allowd in, so i called myself out of school, and left on the 27th street bus. we went downtown and got on the next bus going north on 27th. we went to petsmart, the most adorable cat was there too. i wanted to take him home. its not fair, life, sometimes. we came back. james rapped for us, and we were gangstas for a while. it was quite fun. claire, and phil, at one time, near me, makes me feel so incredably loved. its mad. i love phil. and my dad's salsa dip. and family guy.
.
you know, i wish i could NOT think of you. i wish you would have hugged me yesterday and i wish you werent attempting, without trying, to ruin everything ive ever dreamed of. you and your attempts at happiness, and your stupid flirting. i hate how you flirt with EVERYTHING. even the guys that call you a queer. its not your fault that girls are hopelessly attracted to you. and thats how you make me feel. hopeless, and worthless. i hate you. i dont care if you make me the happiest ive ever been at times, i truly hate you. even when you make me smile, i hate you. i hate you more and more when my mind forces me to think about you when i WANT to think about someone else. and when i try to hate you, my mind makes me like you. idk. i just hate you and i wish i nver knew you......i wish you'd go away.......but now that i know you, that wont seem to happen. hysteria. good song right?
.
dont worry, thats not about phil. but phil and i will get married someday and have holidays in the dordogne. i know it. i wish i could be in illinois right now. just for the weekend. a weekend away. i know who i think about, but i hate it. i love phil. he needs to get away.
.
last night, i missed tyler. therefor, once again, reducing the number of hours that i sleep by miles. if i dont get sleep in tomorrow, im gonna be dead. i swear it. im so exhausted that i just want to sit and cry during lunch, not eat. at all. im so happy. i am. truly. its just hard to show with...what.....3 hours of sleep? i hate this life.
.
love
Your Posh Bird
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home