Iowa

Iowa sucks. literally. and it smells bad and the water tastes funny. the beds are up too high and not squishie enough. the kids sleep loudly. nana's breathing machine is loud and makes bump in the night which scare the shit out of me. and NANA HAD THE FUCKING NERVE TO PUT A 'RED' NIGHTLIGHT IN MY ROOM FOR JESSICA. wtf? red light? oh yeah, thats safe. that wont get me eaten. its bad enough im away from the safety of callen.......let alone with a fucking red light and an open door. jesus. i literally shit my pants when i woke up this morning at like 5. oh my god. fuck im still scared now and im about to read callen's story.

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ive worked my marker in the middle to fit my moods. lol. arent i smart? i gotta tag board! IM SO HAPPY. lol. derek has one too. hes kinda updating on it too. loser. dont be so lazy and blog! lol. im being mean. lol. aol sucks. lol.

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i still cant believe gabe called me. i thought it was brandon so i was all 'idc who this is' and shit but then he's like...its gabe. i was so happy. aparently he knows chad who was ashley's house the other day. hes going to lhs. i was so glad to have talked to him. ive been wondering what happened to him for months!! almost a year! lol. and i got elliot's sn back and walker's. thankfully.and umm, josh burden's. and eliot and brendan and garret. i highly doubt i will tlak to eliot, seeing as how hes matt's friend and same with rob, they'd prolly yell at me for hurting him and id tell them that they couldnt understand and that it wasnt all my fault and theyd call me a dirty skank and say matt deserves better like emily hooker er i mean tooker. *atleast im not coughing* so, i guess it doesnt matter.

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its thundering outside. big booms. the house shook once. they're not as loud down here. but it sounds like someone trying to crawl through the door. so im freaking out. lol. this day sucks. i just want to sit and watch tv. no sewing. no cookies. no nothing. just tv and internet. damnit.

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im playing maroon 5 on repeat. the first few songs. i might change the cd soon. i prolly wanna retreat upstairs soon and tell nana to make fritters and bangers. mmmmm. yummy. im so tired tho. i could not sleep. so i played ryan's gamboy advanced for a few hours. and alot of times id wake up crying. i was having the worst nightmares......very bad nightmares about callen. it bothered me. and i was hiccoughing earlier and bent over to put in a cd and i almost threw up. the hiccoughs were messing up my stomach and my throat. i really miss callen. and its not a kinda miss where im sad and i mope around. its a miss where im almost throwing up and crying and seriously depressed. mom better get here at two instead of five. she said anywhere between noon and dinner. PLEASE BE TWO P.M. PLEASE. IF YOU LOVE ME MOMMY, YOU WILL BE HERE SOON. omg. omg. omg. i got into a fight with my daddy about my mommy. seriously. it was bad. dad was yelling at me and taking mom's side and saying i have no reason to hate her. and that i shouldnt use her, even if thats all shes good for. that ticked me off big time. so i gave up and went to my room and played with butters. so, im gonna go now. TAGGY PWEASEY!

..::Brittni::..