Close your eyes, Let the silence, Conqour the meaning of your lives

so, like i was telling you about last night at tim's house...well, i wen to bed and couldnt sleep and was kinda depressed so i put on evanessence's my immortal. i was crying and gasping so i backed up against my wall and held my palms to my throat for two minute *max* intervals with 30 secs in between. after the sixth time, i dont remember anything except the impact of the floor. i woke up around 2 and crawled into bed and fell asleep. then, just about 20 minutes ago i was listening to jew and sugarcult and was so frustrated and depressed that as i walked to get my meds and a glass of water put my hands to my throat and pushed. i remember the kitchen floor. and the clock saying ?:27 of course dad had left already so it had to have been 4:27, i woke up at 4:41. scary, huh? i loved it. i just closed my eyes and colapsed. i loved it. exhilerating yet calming. and it helps me fall asleep cuz the drowsy headache. NEW BADHABIT. HANDS TO THROAT BITCHES. this is prolly harmful to my brain, lack of blood flow, yet idc. how ppl die due to lack of blood flow to the brain?

Songs to Mock Life Anew

1)pour some sugar - def leppard
2)b r right - trina ft ludacris
3)light my fire - the doors
4)forget it - breaking benjamin
5)ugly - the exies
6)kashmir - led zeppelin
7)baby's on fire - brian slade
8)lollipop porn - crazytown
9)All American Rejects - Last Song
10)back at one - r.kelly
11)whatcha waiting for - gwen stefani
12)hands down - dashboard confessional

Fire, trucker hats, IT and Hide n Seek

jsut got back from tim's. well, mark drove me, he WAS with alan but we stopped at his dad's house and hung out for a min and then we drove to tim's. tim and i left right away to hollywood video to rent movies. well, we decided to rent monty python: a collection of the best skits, the haunting and poltergeist. well, they threw a fit about renting none-rated movies to someone without a card. so we went to russ's and osco: none, then we bought signs at shopko and went to tim's. mike (from friday ngiht) called and so did phil. we got there and phil was already there. so we hung out. i met dalton and rick. re-met emily and mike. lol. we kinda watched IT. ppl lit themselves on fire *mainly rick*. everyone ate pizza except me, then em arrived. emily is cool. we were breathing heavely and then having ppl hold our necks agains tthe wall so wed pass out, i passed out onto emily. and then rick mooned derek on the webcam *SORRY DEREK, I LOVE YOU* lol. and em had to leave, so we went outside and played hide and go seek. phil and i made out. hes a decent kisser. really sweet tho. and i wrestled rick and almost beat him. then when phil was IT, we *including me, tim rick and dalton* went to the park. i proved my yoga training, they proved that lighters work. lmao. we went back and dad was there. :( and when dad and i got to best buy, i found out dad wanted me to stay so he could go to hooters. dumb bitch. lol. loves.

Tick, Tock, Your life goes on, Just Watch the clock

been wearing my hair down lately. its pretty nice.im starting to prefer it. saw tim last night. had starbucks. starbucks and tim = very happy brittni. mom's getting me punkin pie candles for my bday. ppl who read this: birthday ideas, CANDLES. mom's also getting me a gift card for starbucks. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm vanilla bean frappacino. mmph. lol. tim is being a sweety. dusti pulled a nasty trick on me. saw mandy on bp. saw mike and chris from poar too. posted on derek's blog. im calling him tomorrow. befor i carve punkins and trick or treat and stuff. i hope hes ok with it. life is good. havent smoked. i feel more mature. like, i dress more like a girl, and i act more like an adult. ive been responsible and all that good shit. excpet homework. lol. jordan was dating mike's friend moises's exgf lauren and i told him that she s a cheating bitch....i was right. YES. SWEET. mark's on his way so im gonna go get ready. loves. will write more later.

xBrittni

Eyes that shine burning red, dreams of you all through my head.

omfg. lol. andy's a sweetheart. i miss my boy. dusti and tray are fighting again. started playing alice. it kicks ASS. its demented tho. playing doaxbv. lol. tourny at my house on sunday. and the guys are bringing an xbox console and halo2. talked to mike, chris and mandy on b.p. it was cool. branden's outta poar now. damnit. its 4 26 am. seeing tim tongiht. and tomorrow. and sunday. david and mike and andy and jason are really cool now. i feel loved.
.
ive loved the song kashmir all alone and never knew. jesus im stupid.

Lines

got this from chloe's elljayy
.
( bold things are true)

01. I have never kissed someone of the same sex.
02. I see a therapist.
03. I'm the youngest child.
04. I am drawn to things associated with sadness.
05. I love my gauged earrings.
06. I wear black eyeliner every day.

07. I am extremely influenced by kindness.
08. I love to write, even though I think I suck at it.
09. I can't live without lipgloss
10. I’m probably emotionally scarred.
11. I lived in Tahoe.
12. I spend money I have.
13. I'll be in college for over 4 years.
14. I love designer handbags.
15. I’ve had a concussion before.
16. I’m not good with confrontation.
17. I loved the Backstreet Boys.
18. I have more than a couple horrible memories.
19. I'm addicted to Degrassi.
20. I’m spiritual… but not religious.
21. My first kiss was unexpected
22. I start school on Jan 4th or 5th.
23. I love taking pictures.
24. I hate girls who are fake.
25. I can be mean when I want to.
26. When I allow myself to get close to people, I get very attached

27. I am bisexual.
28. I have way too many pairs of shoes.
29. I've seen She’s All That at least 50 times.
30. I dress how I feel that day.
31. I love Charmed.
32. Sometimes I cry for almost no reason.
33. I hate when people are ridiculously late.
34. I procrastinate.

35. Winter is my favorite season.
36. I have too many clothes for my closet/dresser.
37. I love to sleep.
38. I wish I was smarter.
39. I believe that it is wrong to be gay.

40. I have a lot drama

41. No one really knows me.
42. I love my hair.
43. I sometimes fight with my parents.
44. I am passionate about my interests.
45. I have had the chicken pox.
46. I’m a hopeless romantic.
47. I feel empty sometimes.
48. I am/was most likely clinically depressed at a point in my life.
49. I am addicted to coffee.
50. I am very outgoing.
51. Christmas is my favorite holiday.

52. i can be very insecure

53. I don't notice it, but I'm told I'm very softspoken.
54. I hate ignorant people.
55. I love my laptop.
56. I love guys that can play guitar and have lip rings.

57. I state the obvious.
58. I'm a happy person.
59. I’m pretty mellow.
60. I contemplate suicide.
61. I hate cleaning my room.
62. I tend to get jealous.

63. I like to play video games.
64. I love John Mayer.
65. I get more upset when I see an animal hurt than a person.

66. I'm a vegetarian/vegan/don't eat beef.
67. I don't like to study for tests.
68. I am too forgiving.
70. I have a good sense of direction
71. I love school.
72. I’ve played a musical instrument for more than 5 years.

73. I tend to feel inadequate.
74. I love kisses on the forehead.
75. I love the color blue.
76. I don't sew.
77. I am not addicted to drugs.
78. I wear contacts.
79. PRESIDENT BUSH IS A COMPLETE AND UTTER MORON.

80. I become stressed easily.
81. I don't take criticism well.
82. Conformity is stupid.
83. Chris Carrabba is one of the sexiest men alive.
84. So is Conor from Bright Eyes.
85. I love my family.
86. I don't mind getting shots.
87. I am a perfectionist when it comes to certain things.
88. I always wanted to learn to play the drums.
89. I can be too hard on myself.
90. I’m probably going to have premarital sex.

91. I don’t like my nose.

92. I am very religious.

93. I still act like a little kid.
94. I am ridiculously indecisive.
95. I believe in a higher power or some form of an afterlife.
96. I love music.
97. i believe in falling in love at any age

98. I have problems letting go of people.
99. I tend to think with my heart more than my head.

100. I don’t really like ice cream.

101. my eyes change colors when i cry

102. i love kissing in the rain

103. I enjoy having my bottom lip bitten.
104. I prefer cats over dogs.
105. I think people are beautiful when they cry.
106. I have self-inflicted scars on my body.
107. I love carbs.
108. I know who Foamy and Pillz-E are.
109. I am open-minded.
110. I pirate music.

And I Wish You'd Die, At My Feet, Begging for Forgiveness

a current email from my mom contained the following:

Well, I guess I don't know any of this because you haven't really come to me and told me. I haven't seen any bruises on you. You never showed me any when I was there!! I can't help you with something if you make me believe everything is "Peachy!" That isn't my fault!! If you act like everything is OK then I can only assume it is. I'm not a mind reader Brittni!!

As far as me having a perfect life because I'm not there - that is an assumption and I'm offended that you would even go there. You don't know what I go through not being around you and Mike. Just like you tell me I don't know what you go through because I'm not there. You don't know the shit I get for leaving you and Mike! You don't know what people say about me because I left you and Mike - so back off sister. Life isn't easy and I'm sorry to say that!! My Mom used to threaten to put me in a home, so don't go there with me. I have been there and I have been 16 years old thinking all the world was against me. But I quickly learned that I cannot have everything I want.

Your father and I tried getting you assistance - if life was so bad then why didn't you tell them? Maybe they could have placed you in foster care - if living with your father and brother is so terrible. I can guarantee that foster care will be 10X's worse, but if that is what you want then I guess I can talk to your dad about it. I wouldn't want you in an environment that is abusive in anyway. You can live with me - but I can also guarantee as I am sitting here - I refuse to put up with some of the shit your father does, so living with me isn't going to be a walk in the park. You WILL learn a whole new way of living!! You WILL have all new friends because I will move you to IL. YOU WILL do certain chores, etc.... etc.... But it is your choice. Not that your father will go along with that one either.

I don't spoil your brother!! I don't do any more for him than I do for you. You don't come and sit with me on the couch because you are to busy talking to friends on the computer or phone. In fact, if I remember correctly I was upset because you wanted to go away on Saturday night (my last night there) and I let you. SO, don't tell me that I don't want or try to be a part of your life and spend time with you. Your brother will come up stairs and sit with me and watch TV. I also remember that your brother was in trouble while I was there and you weren't!! HHHUUUMMM, let's think about this one! Your brother isn't any more an angel than you are - I'm sure he has been in his fair share of trouble - the unfortunate part is - NO ONE tells me about it. Again, if I don't know about it - I can only assume everything is OK!

I scold you because your language is terrible for a 16 year old. I scold you because you are my daughter! Because that IS WHAT MOTHERS DO!! If I didn't scold you then I wouldn't give a shit - but I do and so I come down on you. You have to learn just like the rest of us. Life is not easy Brittni.

But again, if life is so terrible - let me know and I will talk to your dad about placing you in foster care.
_______________________________
lmao. i used to cry when my dad would yell and hit me, i was cry I WANT MY MOMMY. lmao. how pathetic. and ppl says 'you should respect ur momma' fuck that. stupid btch. fuck that. im fucking sick of everyones shit

I HATE MYSELF AND I WANT TO DIE

the fucking end

Quizzes....

Your a Dark Angel...and hey, you probably knew it.
Dark angel are in truth, very malicious, but a
sign of one also is very sad. Dark Angel all
used to be pure angels, but something went very
wrong with their life. Either it was the
sudden, murder of a loved one, betrayl, or pure
torture to them, dark angels have commited
their life to Satan himself. They are silent,
and their wings are dark black feathers, or
blood red. Dark Angels appear when there is
someone dying, or a murder. If you see one, it
means the death of a loved one is expected.
Dark Angels cannot actually harm a human, but
they love to see the suffering of one.


What Kind of ANGEL are you? (For Girls only) This Quiz has amazingly Beautiful Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla



You're Brigitte Bardot!


What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


Linkin park- the very expressive band with a very
good main singer


^^Who is your ultimate Rock Band?^^(pics+new results)
brought to you by Quizilla


You are Tim the Enchanter! Sure you can blow up
small objects, but no-one really respects you.
But you'll have the last
laugh...MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!


Which Monty Python & the Holy Grail Character are you REALLY?
brought to you by Quizilla

WOOT VAMPIRE HUNTER D. I KNOW SOME ANIME BITCHES!

The vampire is entranced by you and he just met
you! Now thats power! Keep it up!(I'm running
low on pictures of vampires, dark angels and
angels... if you ahve any could you please give
'em to me? Much apperciated!)


Would a light angel, vampire or dark angel fall for you?
brought to you by Quizilla


You are a seductive vampire. You lurer your
victims to you with your looks, and possibly
more...you have no conscience when it comes to
killing them...


What Kind Of Vampire Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

SWEET

lucky your the fucken sexy one, YOU FUCKEN HAVE SEX
WITH YOUR VICTIMS he/she will be your slave
forever because your the goddess in bed plus
you get feed and also he/she wont care just the
only thing that you have to do is fuck him.
your not just the sexy vampire your also the sex
vampire


what kind of vampire r u....
brought to you by Quizilla


Well well well, the old fashioned 17th century
vampire, one of my faves. You look for the good
things in life, you posses a lot of classical
class, and follow that of the original
vampires, you have no shame in what you are,
infact you embrace it, you love it and wouldn't
have it any other way. Your wealth is
unspeakable and your way of luring people with
your mystical ways and looks is amazing, and
most people would often call you The
Seductress. Please rate this quiz!


What Kind Of Vampire Would You Be?NOW WITH PICS!!! (Cool answers, AND FOR GILRS UNLESS YOU ARE A CROSSDRESSER)!
brought to you by Quizilla

You're as dark as can get. You like to laugh at
people, make fun of them, hurt their feelings.
You're in so deep, you'll never get out, and
you probably don't want to get out too. You
make the world a darker place. Better get my
flashlight...

Please rate ^^


What kind of dark person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


You represent... loneliness.
Always alone and always sad about it... unlike
angst, you don't have to look for a reason to
be miserable. You want to be in the company of
people but aren't sure how to act when you're
with them. Sometimes you have to make an
effort. You can't always wait for others to
come to you.


What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla


Your anime hair color is white.


What is your anime hair color?
brought to you by Quizilla

To Zoso

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong I will be faithful
'Cos I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.
Chorus

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...
Verse 2

And when the stars are shining brightly
In the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish
Send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy
For all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded
By the comfort and protection of..
The highest power.
In lonely hours.
The tears devour you..
I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me...
Bridge

Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'Cos it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do...
Chorus


i <3 you

Stoned

I HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN STONED. shweeeet. here's my weekend:
friday: had the night of my life
.
saturday: watched movies all day, cried a little, idk y. then, ash came over and asked me to hang out with her. dad thought i stayed the night with her. we went to kfc and hung out with edward, dustin and friend showed up. we all hung out. went to bill's house, which is the kick it spot, and we smoked like 10 blunts between me, kasey o, ashley e, dustin, edward, clay, josh, dom, and some other guy. it was fun. i was so fucked. i fell asleep and woke up and couldnt see straight. i was laughing. we went to the park by walgreens cuz the kick it spot is in those apartments. then i passed out in front of the tv laying on the ground next to dustin. i just passed out. everyone watched a movie. lol. stayed the night at dustins with him and josh. went home.

sunday: went shopping. had mcdonalds, went to the mall, got a new pair of jeans, pair of sweat pants, black shirt and a foamy shirt. came home after getting grocieries, then put grocieries away, ate bratwurst and went to ashleys to talk. then i ended up comng home, changing, and staying with ashley again. so ashley, kasey and i went to bill's house and smoked a blunt. we watched space jam and i passed out. we left and i ate romen noodles at ashley's. started watching family guy and passed out. woke up to see nick yelling, max grunting, winston's tail in my face and then terry woke me up. tery and i watched the food network and then i came home.

i miss my baby. i might not be able to see him today, unless i go to the mall with ashley but shed freak if i saw him there. it would be odd. lol. well, im gonna go make some spaghetti-os and have a nap. bye bye pplz.

Bush vs Kerry

i will of course, vote for kerry, if only bcuz im Pro-Choice, bcuz i do believe that we have SOME small reason for being in war. i dont like us being in war, but we are, and thats that, protesting will get me no where. but here's a cute joke.
.


Subject: Barber Shop


Barber Shop
> >
> > G. W. Bush and John Kerry somehow ended up at the
> same barbershop. As they
> > sat there, each being worked on by a different
> barber, not a word was
> > spoken. The barbers were even afraid to start a
> conversation, for fear it
> > would turn to politics.
> >
> > As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who
> had Kerry in his chair
> > reached for the aftershave. Kerry was quick to
> stop him saying, "No
> thanks,
> > my wife, Theresa will smell that and think I've
> been in a whorehouse."
> >
> > The second barber turned to Bush and said, "How
> about you?"
> > Bush replied, "Go ahead, my wife doesn't know what
> the inside of a
> > whorehouse smells like".
>

.
my grandma sent me that. how awesome is that? but we have a student vote on november 1st so i thought, maybe id make a political post. now, i believe in peace, and i want it in this world. if not, in myself. lol. but, we were asked my the people of the middle east for help. in a way, even if we're doing it an odd way, in the end, we will have helped those countries. we should all be glad we dont have jacqous chirac for a fucking president. dad and i aregued about pro-choice pro-life shit. now, if some 15 year old is kidnapped and raped and released, do you really expect her to have the baby. that would ruin her life. i think that girl and her family should have the choice of abortion or not. stupid fucks make such a god damn fuss over killing something thats swimming around in a bunch of fluids and pussy shit and connect thru a cord. seems a bit, UN lifelike to me. oh well. enough of this.....im tired and have shit to upload and burn

adios bitches
-Brittni

post script : i miss my baby something terrible.

Gossip Folk

still listening to derek's blog. i finally got up the stupidity to look for derek's phone number. awesome huh? i really wanna call him but im totally nervous and want his permission. i have free weekend minutes. id totally call him. lol.
.
josh burden's sn. *gay ass sn right?* well, hes got a subpro, and a supfolder in his subpro. lol. its called Shit List. LMAO. GUESS WHOS ON IT?!?! *points at self* you guessed it. ME! how awesome. who knows WHAT i did to deserve it, but, its so fucking awesome. i was like, SHWEET. lmao.
.
i just finished watching fantasia. lmao. how awesome. now its Milo & otis. *YAY* lol. and then im gonna watch alice in wonderland. i was suposed to see The Grudge with phillip but im starting to get david's cold. i know david's last name now. lol. its weird, im losing so many friends right now. but im still, up, and about and feeling, well, not alone, i know im not alone. but im secure, even when im sittign at home eating sunflower seeds and crying. lol. im trying to make dad let me drive down to the ustop for a pop.
.
juvy threw a whiny pissy fit at michelle cuz i found out his sn. HE PUT HIS NEW SN IN HIS OWN DAMN PROFILE. LMAO. WTF?!?! LOL. so he calls michelle and asks her if she gave it to me, now, if he wasnt ticked off about it, he would have asked me, but he was obviosuly pissed to ahve asked michelle. lmao. so, i was mad at him for treating me like that. werid i know. well, then i try to say hi on friday and he fucking keeps on walking and give me a dirty look. i was like, ok wtf? lol. so, he just IMed me and asked me if im gonna be pissed at him forever and some bullshit. i told him plain and simple: i never meant anything to you, never did, never will. period. im more of a burden then a blessing. we both agree on that and you know ur life would be better without me. he pulls some ppl-pleasing bullshit and says he 'doesnt care if we're friends and he would mind stopping by every once in a while' even tho he never did anyways unless he needed a tool or paintballs or to go somewhere since everyone else was busy. **I WAS ONLY BACKUP** lol. how funny. so. yeah. fuck that. lol. i think its funny bcuz i was like, head over heels , youre the greatest, id do anything for you for him. lol. and now....oh well. i love it when ppl dont take on things that could have been great. moral of the story: ITS BETTER TO REGRET DOING SOMETHINY YOU DIDNT LIKE, THEN TO REGRET NOT DOING SOMETHING THAT YOU COULD HAVE LIKED. you dont know what will really work for you.
.
a few words to my baby:
ill be ur dream
ill be ur wish
ill be ur fantasy
ill be ur hope
ill be ur dreams
be everything that you need

Fucking Comp and Kisses

like you know, dad's working on my comp. pos father. so i have to update everything myself bcuz hes a bitch. so, my comp is gay. i have no music, and i went to derek's blog.....MUSIC! LOTS OF IT. I LOVE YOU DEREK. YOU MADE MY DAY. timmy's gonne all today and most of tomorrow. bitch. i miss him. poor guy was sad when i left. I pisH YOU TIMOTHY! i love these songs. lol. dog's haircut is ugly. i think i already said that. dad ordered pizza and its not here yet. all american rejects. classic pop music man. from a few years ago....havent heard from them in a while. hmm? this may be the last thing that i wrote for long, can you hear me smiling when i sing this song, for you? and only you. sorry, singing. well, life in a sentance: going to england in the summer, matt schock hurt me and will never be able to make up for it, not that he will, michelle's relationshp with jared mocks mine so much its scary, nobody believes me that he abused me either, stupid fuckass, im so weak and pathetic and stupid that i cut myself again, this time it was deep, im a bitch, im lonely and indecisive, im hungry and i want chinese and i want to go to barned and noble so bad i cried. life is a bitch, then we die. i wrote a really good poem thursday night, maybe wednesday, not sure, but it was really really good. like, UBER good. aced atleast one of my quizzes yesterday and i got a B or higher on atleast two i think. i have next week off. later days bitches

-Brittni

The wall

apparently korn covered a pink flloyd song. its pretty good. im not a biug korn fan, or flloyd but its good. worth listening to. i saw phil & tim today. it rocked my face off. we saw hide and shriek at pius, it was hilarious. i loved it. gibbs used to teach at pius, thats totally news to me. i was cool tho. meet some emily girl tho, she was like......OMG ARE YOU BRITTNI? i was like, ........YEAH........lmao. cuz phil and i were holding each other. she goes, omg, phil tlaks about you all the time. lol. i feel bad. i did go to tim's house. his house rocked. my dad WANTS me to go to pius. lmao. it rocks. im in dad's room cuz hes working on my comp......which is bs. my comp was just fine. i loved it. oh well. im about to leave and cal tim. bye pplz.

-Brittni

Like Lovers Do

<3 Like Lovers Do <3
life is filled with longing
dearest known
i yearn no more
but for your kiss, layed
upon my skin
every inch
at any moment
the way lovers do
your arms linked with mine
black light
incense and doorways
the way weve always
dreamed of love
one moment, lasting forever
your lips on mine
my hands on your waist
the way lovers do
i want you to
never let go
yo're my everything
the one to love me
the way i do like
the way lovers do

<3 Faith <3
ppl r heretic
teach against the faith
of love ruling all
my only religion baby
and then
when the world falls
and mountains crumble maybe
even clouds will tear down
sing this song to me baby
let me know you love me
disbelieve what ppl say
love is my religion baby
teach me your faith

<3 Remembering Yesterday, A Dream I Had <3
run away with me
lets leave this place
full of demons and
winged flies, spying
we'll leave to a dream
no more hate, and tears
no longer grace my cheeks
a place of eternal sunshine
and water fountains
with dancing hearts
well have forever
togetherto love each other
while our eyes shine
and smiles dance
across our lips
and i feel jealous baby
i know this will
never truly be
youl never feel
what you mean to me
in this dream baby

<3

today is ok. mike and i fought i bit him. ive still got a minor concussion and a bruised face. it hurts something fucked. im listening to eminem's just lose it. lol. its so funny. claire said ho to me today...she goes "hey brittni, im skipping" it was so funny. i had to cut two pieces off the tip of a penink cartridge with my straightedge so jeremy's ears didnt close. matt and i were gonna 'meet after school and duke it out'. lol. dillon gave me a charlie horse. tim got msn so we kinda....like....talk on the webcam. its cool. he makes funny faces. i miss him and phil. we were gonna see a movie today.....but they couldnt. dad was gonna let me go too. sigh. maybe tomorrow? i hope. plz god. lol. i now have a god. jim morrison. he's my god. his lyrics are my bible. his words are what i follow. BITCHES. besides missing my boys *lol* and being suffocated and punched in the head/face, this day is good. loves
<3 Brittni <3

This is Where I Landed Once The Throat was Slit

matthew. i cant believe you. and ive proven you wrong. and ill take a pic to prove it. ill cut myself on every ince of skin. the reason the ice was used was to comfort you so you knew it didnt hurt. who are you to talk shit to some amber bitch? wtf? that hurt like you would not believe. you know i never did that to you. wtf? its, just, amazing how careless, and heartless that was. when you stuck by me, even during and after callen, and we were still close, for no FUCKING reason, you go and act like everyother guy. well, atleast you can call yourself mainstream.
.
this is where i landed once the throat was slit
the shawl of blood around my perfect shoulders
the thigns you said to slice the skin, the way your lips moved
and the head, once part of me, rolls away, just like your love for me
.
apperently i 'need to back off of matt' and im a 'pozer' and 'stupid'. w/e
.
OMFG.
.
im beautiful when im asleep
martini kisses land on my
my blistered bloody scarlet lips

Silk Sheet with Blood Stains

life is good.
.
i refuse/can not veiw derek's blog. i have to go thru his little, thing ma bob dashboardy thing and read the posts. his picture.....omg. i knew he was hot but JESUS. the good lord is loving me now! my best friends are all hot guys. except one likes penises DAMN YOU DEREK....i cried. damnit.
.
damnit. lol.
.
i talked on the phone last night. from like, 10 or so till 12:30 or so. its was FUCKING AWESOME. we talked about sex, clothes, ummmmmmmmmm, my childhood, being sad, wishing we could see each other at that exact moment, my cold room, the erotic shirt i want, incense, queen of the damned, vampires, eyes, their eyes. it was so awesome. compliments galore! lmao. oh, and teddy bears. lord knows i need a new one. *dog got to callen's so i have NONE :( * lmao.
.
i miss phil. <3
.
i took photos of myself yesterday NOT LIKE THAT! loser. lmao. but they're really sexy and good looking and hot and stuff. lol. they're up on picturetrail. i love those pix really. and taking them made me feel really sexy. and everyone said i looked good. now if im that sexy WHY CANT I CUDDLE WITH SOMEONE, OR DO SAME MAD MAKING OUT??? lol. idk. i feel physically lonely tho. i could use atleast i really really big hug.
.
michelle rocks.
.
tony, the freshman tony, that likes me, is now annoying. i used to like him, when i was single, and the only reason id ever kiss him, EVER, is his tongue piercing. and that can totally wait. but yesterday, i skipped class to hang out with liz, and then tyler. BITCH OWES ME MCDONALDS. fucking loser. but, while i was waiting in the car, with cam and tony, cam got out *by tony's orders obviously* and all of a sudden tony started kissing me all over my neck. i was like WTF YOU FUCKING BASTARD?!?! lol. i love my neck kissed and i would have been happy were it someone out of a group of select ppl, but EW. lol. and he was all making sloppy kissing noises and wouldnt get the fuck off of me. i was pissed. besides that *and no mcdonalds*, yesterday totaly rocked.
.
i <3 you all......not really
.
..::Brittni::..

Xbox.com :: Need For Speed 2: Underground Game Detail Page

Xbox.com :: Need For Speed 2: Underground Game Detail Page

Gum

spearmint reminds me of kissing phil. im now chewing spearmint gum. XD i <33333 you phil!

i can look
at these photos
and smile with
memories of you.

i want to see
your face again
and kiss you
a milion times over

for every second
ive missed your
arm around me
like you do.

and i love you
pure and simple
when the earth
loves the clouds tears

and ive withered down
before and tears escaped
out of longing
from my heart.

that kiss
like the first smile we shared
is god gift to me
i dont know what i did for it.

bu i treasure it
the way i treasure you
and wouldnt trade you for the world
you mean everything to me.

and ill be there for you,
when you're in need
and hold you tight
in the dark of night
the way thought of you
do to me.

and i love you, sweet angel
the way the clouds love the sky
and you can count on me
the way we count on a sunrise
each begining of each new day
and ill love you, sweet angel
for ever more.


<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

i love the feeling
knowing i could make you smile.
and knowing you're happy
when you're near me.
and i get butterflies
when i think about that kiss.
and im going crazy when im alone.
and im nervous about calling you
over that leering phone.
you know i love you
and wish i could see you
every minute of every day
and i know if i died,
right here with you next me,
id die happiest of all souls.
but i love the feeling,
knowing that you make me smile.
and knowing im happy
when you're near me.
and i love the feeling
knwoing that i love you.
dearest friend.
you are my world
my heaven and earth
my stars and moon
sun and clouds
and rain and shine.
you are what makes my day go
and i love the feeling
knowing that its just to two of us.

Dr Pepper

the blog is being updated and changed by the one, the only, DEREK! i love you sweety. those pics ARE of me. lol. but please mind our dust. lol.
.
im drinking ALL this dr pepper alone. lol.
.
denton and fuzzy and eric and derek and tanner all have pics on buddy pic dot com. lmao.
.
i miss phil something horrible. i have been crying all day. nut just from that, im having a bad day, but i miss him. i cant wait till i get a car, ill be with him every chance i have. hes the greatest. lol. GOD I LOVE HIM. i ahvent been this happy with someone of the male sex since matt schock. i love you phil. <333333
.
anyways, yes. plz hold ur comments till the tagboard is fixed. thanks.
.
Brittni

PacMan

so i got the pics up from last night. i feel like shit. i need some sleep. and its freezing in my house. im sad. im crying acctually. and listening to led zeppelin. strummng my guitar and holding down random frets. lol. done. im gonna nap soon. since i feel like shit anyways. i pissed off michelle by warning her about dating an abusive guy. i mean, I DATED HIM FOR SEVEN MONTHS AND WE BROKE UP EXACTLY A YEAR AGO. wtf? youd think id know if i had bruises on my face from him....fuck chloe, if she thinks he would abuse someone, when i have the memories and the catatonic problems and whatever else youd think id remember my bf hitting me. im so sick of ppl's shit. everyone's so happy, and i just happen to be the saddest person. why cant others be sad like me? fuck that. sigh. oh well. i dont care if trevor and mike and michelle and mitch and ian hate me. its shit to me. it really is. i have tim and phil and knowing that im ok. i dont see how ppl can hate tim. wtf is wrong with them? i love you tim. I LOVE YOU PHIL! <3 lol. olivia and i are pulling a prank on gabe. its gonna be so funny. its odd how tim and/or phil knows olivia but she dont know them. lol. oh well. well. im gonna go. this is bullshit.

Muppets, Monsters and Madness

homecoming DAY rocked. well, the night did. lol. bad things first, dad bought a 2liter of pop instead of cans. so, that sucked. and i SO didnt make one acts. what bullshit. and alyssa dad and she has cheer! SHES NOT EVEN GOOD. WTF? im so sad. i was bawling at school. i wanted to be in that damn play so bad. oh well, more time for phil & tim; the two greatest ppl ever.
.
so yeah, phil and tim, the two greatest ppl ever came over today. how great! we laughed so much. im so glad that im so comfortable around my bf. hes great. hes so adorable. he smiled so much, and ive never smiled that much. im so happy. we made jokes, danced, listened to ween, played guitar and laughed more. lol. and i kissed him! 0.0 oooh man, ive never felt butterflies like that. like, good butterflies. holy shit. lol. im so happy. im acctually happy with my bf. lol. and i get along with his bestest bud. its great. i felt bad leaving tim kinda alone, poor guy. but we had fun. IM GETTING MY ASS OUTTA THE GLASS HOUSE. lol. and umm, the muppets and tim curry epiphanies. lol. and ummm, idk. but im the happiest person ever. i will have pics on my picturetrail very soon
.
Pictures
.
..::Brittni::..

Fries Bitch

ok, before i forget this, dad and mike and i went to old chicago (i was stoned off my ass) and we were all done and mike and dad were still eating my fries and the waiter (who was a little slow) went back to get a box and tried to take the plate of fries and my goes 'you can leave that' kinda bossy. lol. then when the guy was gone my dad goes "leave my fucking fries here bitch" lmao. then, just as i was thinking of the Fatkins episode on illwillpress.com my dad goes *kinda loudly* GIVE ME MY CARBS. lmao. it was great. maybe i thought it was funnier cuz i was blown off my ass. lmao.
.
yeah, about the being stoned part....lol. ashley called just as i had finished my homework and asked if i wanted to go with her and some edward guy, so i was like w/e right? and i did, and we got to his house and we were talking about hypnotiq and hennessy and whathave you. and then, he rolled an L i think or something. so then this ugly fat fuck of a human called Zach arrived and we all smoked the L thingy. and then this hot dustin guy came over and holy shit! he is fine as hell. he reminded me of donnie. he plays football for southeast. im suposed to see him in a few days with ashey and edward. but omg. lol. problem is.....i was so depressed most of the time bcuz i really really miss phil and thats why they made me smoke in the first place.
.
so tonight, im so confused. im SUPOSED to go with ellen and trev and mike and i dont want to. not really. itd be great to hang with the guys, or ellen, but both STILL means seclusion. if i go, ill have my cd player the whole damn time bitches. lol. but see, im suposed to go to the mall with sabrina. right after school, which i prefer bcuz i can call my phil and see him and tim. :-D holy shit just the thought gives me butterflies. lol. so id see them and shit but, im suposed to find a dress, i might just find a cute skirt or something cuz i dont wanna look funny toward phil and tim. oh well. hopefully tim will find it cute or something. and i get to see them tomorrow. XD omg. lol... they're coming over for movies. tim's bringing young frankenstein. i was hoping to have them over around 5 and we could get pizza, but it doesnt matter really. im excited just to see phil, let alone hang with the both of those awesome fuckers. lol. personally, the way mike and trev treat me and how little i see phil and tim \, helped me to decide that, well, im going with sabrina after school, and illhave dad pick me up from her house. i gotta email mom right quick for 50 bucks. ill have to have sabrina's mom pick up my stuff from startran. lol.
.
fuck. im gonna have to switch days for staying after school for french club. damnit. now ill be with some other person instead of jazzi. fuck. oh well. madame heminger will let me, i know she will.... right? right. good.
.
ttyl
Loves
Brittni

I love you Derek

derek, omg. i hate to be a worry wart and i bet everyone else that reads ur blog is gonna say omg and whatnot, but this is unbelievable. HOW THE FUCK COULD SOMEONE DO THAT TO SOMEONE SO PRECIOUS? hes such a fucking shit faced motherfucker. i hope he dies. ive only known you for about half a year, and, you're my best friend. theres nothing you could say to bring a sensible caring person to hit you. you're the greatest person ive known. im so worried about you now. if your dad throws a fit about you being gay, i hope something from it comes back and bites him in the ass. tell him its his fault. he's a shit-for-brained good-for-nothing jackass. i hate him. i hate anyone who's treated you that way. i hate them with a deep deep passion. oh, and derek, i still wanna write you a letter. and i might have a ride into mccook in the next few weeks. you need to get back on msn. before i cry more. HOW THE FUCK? sigh. i hope ur dad gets whats comming to him. stupid fucker. derek, i mean, you're so wonderful, and you're caring and kind and everything that everyone else isnt; how could you're dad of all people do that to you? i love you derek.

Movies

Italicize what you've seen part of.
Bold what you've seen all the way through.
Underline what you own. *cant, so ill put stars*
Add three of your own.

01. Trainspotting*
02. Shrek*
03. M
04. Dogma
05. Strictly Ballroom
06. The Princess Bride*
07. Love Actually*
08. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring*
09. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers*
10. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King*
11. Reservoir Dogs
12. Desperado
13. Swordfish
14. Kill Bill Vol. 1
15. Donnie Darko
16. Spirited Away
17. Better Than Sex
18. Sleepy Hollow
19. Pirates of the Caribbean*
20. The Eye
21. Requiem for a Dream
22. Dawn of the Dead (the remake)
23. The Pillow Book
24. The Italian Job (the remake)
25. Goonies
26. Baseketball
27. The Spice Girls Movie
28. Army of Darkness
29. The Color Purple
30. The Safety of Objects
31. Can't Hardly Wait
32. Mystic Pizza
33. Finding Nemo*
34. Monsters Inc.
35. Circle of Friends
36. Mary Poppins
37. The Bourne Identity
38. Forrest Gump
39. A Clockwork Orange
40. Kindergarten Cop
41. On The Line
42. My Big Fat Greek Wedding
43. Final Destination
44. Sorority Boys
45. Urban Legend
46. Cheaper by the Dozen (original version)
47. Fierce Creatures
48. Dude, Where's My Car
49. Ladyhawke
50. Ghostbusters
51. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
52. Back to the Future
53. An Affair To Remember
54. Somewhere In Time
55. North By Northwest
56. Moulin Rouge*
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets*
58. The Wizard of Oz*
59. Zoolander*
60. A Walk to Remember
61. Chicago
62. Vanilla Sky
63. The Sweetest Thing*
64. Don't Tell Mom the Babysitters Dead
65. The Nightmare Before Christmas*
66. Chasing Amy
67. Edward Scissorhands*
68. Adventures of Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
69. Muriel's Wedding
70. Croupier
71. Blade Runner
72. Cruel Intentions
73. Ocean's Eleven (remake)
74. Magnolia
75. Fight Club
76. Beauty and The Beast
77. Much Ado About Nothing
78. Dirty Dancing
79. Gladiator
80. Ever After
81. Braveheart
82. What Lies Beneath
83. Regarding Henry
84. The Dark Crystal
85. Star Wars
86. The Birds
87. Beaches
88. Cujo
89. Maid In Manhattan
90. Labyrinth*
91. Thoroughly Modern Millie
92. His Girl Friday
93. Chocolat
94. Independence Day
95. Singing in the Rain
96. Big Fish*
97. The Thomas Crown Affair [both versions]
98. The Matrix
99. Stargate
100. A Hard Day's Night
101. About A Boy*
102. Jurassic Park
103. Life of Brian
104. Dune
105. Event Horizon
106. Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
107. Dead Fire
108. The Neverending Story
109. Resident Evil
110. Laura Croft: Tomb Raider
111. Pure Country
112. The Evil Dead
113. The Stand
114. Head
115. Shoujo Kakumei Utena: ADOLESCENCE Mokushiroku
116. The Ghost Goes Gear
117. Perfect Blue
118. Bring It On
119. Cowboy Bebop: Knockin' on Heaven's Door
120. Ghost World
121. UHF
122. The Royal Tenenbaums
123. Ichi the Killer
124. Lady Snowblood
125. Bubba Ho-Tep
126. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
127. Wet Hot American Summer
128. Snatch
129. Amelie
130. Boondock Saints
131. 12 Angry Men (remake)
132. Elephant
133. Bowling for Columbine
134. Hedwig and the Angry Inch
135. Cannibal! The Musical
136. The Abominable Dr. Phibes
137. Ghost in the Shell
138. Connie and Carla
139. Grease*
140. Mean Girls
141. The Sandlot
142. Napoleon Dynamite
143. Fern Gully*
144. Christmas Vacation
145. Vegas Vacation
146. Remember the Titans*
MINE
147. Velvet Goldmine
148. The Notebook
149. Bram Stoker's Dracula

Im Not Okay

mmmmm my chemical romance
.
Dreaming my reality
where truth and fiction don't seem to exist
Confusion is home here, but believe in you is what you insist (it's what you insist)

mmmm senses fail
.
im dating phil! we hung out with each other at the mall today, along with tim. tim knows about foamy! FUCK YEAH!
socialD 49 J B: i blush easily around guys i like.
phil: and im usually quiet and shy around girls i like.....
hes soooo sweet. and hes totally awesome. im trying to hook michelle up with tim. even tho she likes josh. she shouldnt date him tho........hed use her.....and then leave her. hes not a great guy, but none of them listen to me. mike v likes ellen. i just know it. i saw liz at the mall. and jamie. but my god today rocked. i saw mark too. we went to his dad's house for piza. his dad and brother are cool. i was being made fun of cuz i was giggling. apparently, im the coolest of mark's friends and they want me over more often. lol. im mostly focused on seeing phil tho. he rocks my socks off. (or pants......LMAO j/p)
.
but i g2g. im tired. bye bye
.
Brittni ^.^

Fuck LPS

lps fucking sucks. why the fuck cant sophomores go to france? hmm? WTF DID WE DO WRONG? THAT IS SO FUCKED UP! WHAT MAKES THEM SO FUCKING SPECIAL? THEY'RE MORE LIKELY TO FUCKING GET DRUNK. stupid fucks think they know us kids. jesus.
.
you know what my new favorite phrase is? Oh Well. it promotes a sense of worthlessness and completion. and giving up. idk. my life kidna revolves aroudn those words.
.
i just remembered, when i was at champions, i was having trevor hold the tix as i counted them, and in the middle of counting, he put a long ribbon of tix in his mouth and we tangoed. lol. it was, well, it was sweet. it made me smile really big and im smiling just thinking of it. trevor is such a great person. im so happy that i know him.....it over-rules the feelings of jealousy that i get.
.
went to knickerbockers last night.......FUN BITCHES! LOL. met someone named ellie, hung out with scuba steve aka fish. that rocked. ian and i both realised we dont hate each other...lol. bridget was asking if i still hate her.....wtf? oh well. (lol) i met a guy named phil......yummy. lol. and his friend tim. they go to pius and they fucking rock. they're newbies to knickerbockrs, but thats ok. phil is hot. so is tim. but i like phil. tim plays bass and guitar and phil plays guitar. which in itself is fucking awesome. but i g2g see phil. ttyl.
.
Brittni

Perfection

i didnt think two people could be more perfect for each other. the hurt, the past, the loves, the.....just fuck it. no matter how much i push and push and get my hopes up, it wont work. i give up ok?
.
tanner and i are kinda....well...over before anything began. mike is an ass. but i still feel bad. and lately, every FUCKING emotion im stuck with is over run by jealousy. and frustraton. i feel so numb and dead. i fucking hate this. FUCK. ya know? i hate how people think that ur stupid for feeling a certain way about certain things and all ur fucking doing is caring. wtf? i think ill decorate my leg tonight....while i lay awake crying. im sure ill be ok.

Poem time

showers are great
they can wash away the blood
from your tainted wrist
or leg
wherever it bleeds
from yuor tainted body
and you're alone
vulnerable
like always, nothing
diffrent
from everyone else
which is why you free the blood from your wrist
or leg
and let the shower wash it away
.
i dream about you
i can never have you
and i walk around each day
numb, like im not really there
filled with a longing.
and idk what the fuck im saying
i have some friends
i never see outside of school
so many people i want
or need
thigns and feelings nobody shares
i fucking hate this.
i wish the world DID revolve around me

Mike

Mike: trevor is right, u think that the world revolves around u, u always want it yur way, and u don't like other ppl, unless they do what u want
.
that was a real im sent to me. guess im not as normal as i hoped. derek's been there for me thru so much. lol. i mis jordan. its been a year since we both met. wow. i miss him so much. ive ben crying. i missed my date with tanner. he didnt get online. oh well. i hate myself and want to die. really. nothing can fucking work out right!

X marks the spot

nick tarlowski winks alot when hes on aim. and jeremy is sweet. sara is lucky. go-karts and speed really do give u an adrenaline rush. trevor's being sweet again, and im alittle happier. josh dropped me, rock solid proof he was using me. i really hope he gets his ass kicked for making me cry. what to do with tanner? prolly not shit. oh well. cried over derek last night. here's a song for how i feel right now...see if you can guess who its aimed at:

shes everything u want
shes everything u need
shes everything inside of u that you wish you could be
she says all the right things, at exactly the right time, and she means it all to you and i dont know why

im everything u want
im everything u need
im everything inside of u that you wish you could be
i says all the right things, at exactly the right time, and i mean nothing to you and i dont know why

slightly alterted of course. right now, i need someone to cry to. a bf. i really truly do. i feel so alone right now. so much longing.....

Who's David

mike was fucking hot with long hair. jeremy and i are talking now. suckpunch street team, since nick and i are talking. scroll down for mike's pic. got mcdonalds with liz, tyler and ellen today. a buck for an awesome sandwhich. maybe one with david tomorrow. hopefully. my legs hurt from pe. trevor and mike were being assholes just now. josh is gonna get locked up and id have myself cut up so much id be a walking cat-scratch post. all grades are Cs or higher and i still can pierce my tongue. i cried today...here's why:
derek
trevor
matt kittrell
my piercing that i cant have
josh
mike
mitch
tanner
and
my dad.
ALL MEN. stupid fucks. jeremy and chaz were talking, i made jeremy laugh :-D and josh kisses me still. maybe he isnt using me. ttyl.
-Brittni

Jeremy

My lj wedding by chynafox
username
age
city
you will marry	exs_on_our_eyes
flower girl	psychic_love
best man	authersadexcuse
bridesmaid	xturnerx
you will have your last fling with	whoisnickdanger
registrar	psychic_love
secretly wants to marry you themself	exs_on_our_eyes
date of the wedding	April 13, 2011
number of times you do it on your wedding night	22
Quiz created with MemeGen!

me marry jeremy? how fucking awesome!

Emo

thinking about josh alot.
first time these past few weeks i havent thought about trevor or derek.
i miss trevor. fucking asshole made me listen to pom. fucker.
josh is a sweety, kissed me in school today. first time someone's done that since jared sknner in 8th grade. lucky me.
dad and i fought last night, told him i hope i die. and i hope hes there to see it.
i feel like shit.
feel like doing something but nothing seems right. maybe ill see josh today.
feel like crying

Nails

i got my nails done so it kinda hurts to type. im gonna file them down tomorrow. lol.
.
just fucking great. i start dating josh and i guess, since mike invited me over tonight he was planning on asking me out. and i wanted to go out with him. i really hope this turns out ok. i mean, i really like mike and ive known him for years. but, i like josh. i hardly know josh, and i dont think i lke him AS MUCH as mike, but he made the move first, and i was waiting for mike, but, i mean, idk. i feel horrible now.
.
went to the union today. saw steve, ash, natasha, nate, cody, adrian, dallas (who was looking good......lol) and chaz and josh of course. josh and i kissed goodbye, thats it, but, idk. i wanted to kiss him, BEFORE my mom was there, but, i was so shy. oh well, we had fun. g2g. ttyl. loves
.
Brittni

Busted

i really dont know what to think anymore. im so very very confused. and then, to add more fucking confusion, everything should be fucking clear as crystal and it is but im still confused, so im confused as to why im confused. i know i like mike, but fucking, hes got some violence problem. I GOT HIT IN THE FACE BY HIS SOCCER BALL! that hurt man. i pushed it aside, it started to piss me off by the third time tho. so i left. that was friday. he came over last night along with tyler and michelle. michelle and i dacned to rap....lol, wait till brad hears about it. hes gonna laugh. lol. mitch and trev and zach and sabrina and everybody else couldnt come. im sooo pissed. im having one some other day. this time itll be ahead. that way people WILL GO! but i had fun either way. it was great. until tyler decided to breath down my neck 24/7 and it got annoying.
.
im dating josh m now. hes so cute. he's short, but hot. lol. is it bad? no. i guess not. cuz i guess he really likes me, i mean really likes me. atleast, thats what chaz said. and ive onyl known him for a week and HE asked ME out. lol. something nobody else has done for a while. he's such a cutie. and hes funny. ashley gets along with him, and i can always go with ash to the union and see him there. he's a babe. lol. i hope to see him tonight. i was gonna see him durign the day, but mom wants me to go with her while mike leaves. so im pretty sure ill see him tongiht.
.
so, there's this band called Busted. and they're fucking awesome. they're a british pop rock band. three guys. they all can play guitar, one can play drums and im not sure aobut bass. they've got the greatest love songs. and some really hilarious songs. i guess they did a song for thunderbirds and so they're pretty popular now. i have tons of their songs and alot of lyrics memorized. lol. they have a song called Britany. but, i like to spell it Brittni. lol. its kinda funny. it's my song now. it makes me feel a bit mroe special. they've got songs like Who's David; a song about a cheating girlfriend. Year 3000; they meet people from the future and a line goes
"Triple breasted women, swim around town, totally naked"
lol. it's hilarious. but yeah. umm. What I Go To School For; a song about their love for a teacher. lmao. ummm. Fake; sexual pressure. lol. and they re-did Peaches by The Presidents of The United States of America. lol. they did it very well. most covers compltetly slauighter songs, but they kinda made it better. im really loving this band. they couldnt get better. MY NEW FAVES. i now a have a fucking favorite band. lol. problem: they're british, which means little to no us tours. poop. maybe they'll be on tour when i go over there.
.
which, speaking of britain, mike dosnt wanna go next summer. and if he dosnt go, I GET TO! YIPPE FUCKING SKIPPEE! OMG. IM SO FUCKING HAPPY! england. holy shit. the thought of having more than a 1% chance of going makes me so happy. im so excited. i have so much mroe to see. especially london's east end. omfg. im so excited.
.
yeah, grades came. i did pretty well. my geometry is a d+ tho. but, mom said fi my grades were good i could pierce my tongue. true, she didnt promise, but still. she said it. and now, when my grades are good, i cant. she wont call dad about it, and she wont just let me do it anyways. dad knows that if i pierce it and take it out too soon, i could fuckign ruin my tongue, so he wont do it. but, i guess i cant. and ive been crying about it. i know thats bad, but i cant help it. I WANT THAT DAMN PIERCING. oh well, mom and i are going to go get our nails done, ttyl. LOVES.

parTy

party party party. ok, so far, mitch cant come. this is gonna suck nuts. im gonna go kidnap him. i cant type much bcuz i have to clean, vaccuum, shower, and move the weights. grrr at my basement.
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derek, will ur sis be playing on nov 11 for regionals or something? cuz lns has this big vball tourny and we get the day off, if so, i wanna meet u there. let me know. loves
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Brittni